Today we were suppose to hear from the US Supreme Court on whether or not they would take up the Prop 8 case and DOMA. But nothing yet. It could come as early as Monday, December 3rd or even on December 7th. Hopefully we will hear something soon. Patience is a virtue, but waiting is a bitch.
So tonight, I am celebrating 5 years since my first date with my lovely wife. It was a day much like today: rainy, cold, mud everywhere. But we had the most romantic time. The evening was filled with butterflies. Not in the air as it was too chilly, but in our tummies. We always giggle at that because we both were so insanely nervous. This is where butterflies in our relationship started. And another layer of the meaning for the sole butterfly in my ink on my arm. The catalyst for change. The chosen direction. Flight. Evolution. Love. Beauty. Freedom.
My decision to be me. My decision to live an outward life surrounded by love. My decision to tread through the mud, the hills, any obstacle...all for the truth. For life to be what it was meant to be. I did not choose to be gay. I was born this way. I made the decision to be free.
Patiently, I await the decision of the United States Supreme Court on whether they will uphold the decisions made by two previous federal courts in California that Prop 8 is unconstitutional.
Friday, November 30, 2012
Sunday, November 25, 2012
Birthday analysis
On Wednesday, November 28th, somewhere in the afternoon during the 3:00 hour, I will turn 39 years old. I was born on a Wednesday, and I am entering into my last year of my 30's on the same day of the week. That means my 40th birthday will be next year, and also fall exactly on Thanksgiving. On Wednesday, I will begin my 40th year of life.
When I began my 30th year of life, I was not in the best of places. I had increasing anxiety and a fear of being around people. I would fall asleep when I was out with friends. I had very poor self-esteem and my health (apparently) was not in the best of places. About mid-way through that year of life, my body told me to slow down. I had my only seizure thus far which made me go to the hospital for testing. I was not healthy. I needed to change my life or I might not see 40 without some really insane health issues. I changed my life: began working out 5 days a week, eating lower carbs and meditating and doing yoga to calm my mind and find my center. On my 30th birthday, I was full of energy and had a vigor for life. Of course, a few years following this is when the real self-analysis happened and I started to be honest about who I was and how I wanted to live, as fearful as it was at the time. My life changed and it was so much better in so many ways.
Somehow, I felt that I could never slip back into unhealthiness again. I have absolutely maintained my sanity: my life is the best it has ever been. I truly mean that when I say it. I cry sometimes, just to myself, because I honestly never thought my life could be this full with my little family. I honestly see my future, with my wife and girls, and it is clear and beautiful and bright. My only concern is my health.
As this 40th year begins, I find myself sleepy (A LOT), cranky, and overweight. I use to blame it on my boobs, saying that they were choking me when I lay down. But honestly, it's my tummy. Now, in case you are not aware, I like to eat. I like curves and I am not all about the skinny figure. My concern is that my body is not responding the way it should be. My knees feel arthritic and no longer have the energy that I had just 10 years ago. I have tried to start doing things but I lack commitment and always have an excuse. But now, it is time. And I am making my commitment here.
I have no goal weight. But I do have an exercise goal. I am committing, to myself, my family and to anyone who reads this, to exercise 4 days of the week. I also am committing to meditate regularly. I cannot state a numeric goal, however, I would like to meditate when I need to. I think it will help me stay focused. I am also committing to eating healthier. I need to keep portion control at the top of my list. I am going to refrain from sugar and eat smaller portions. I am going to do the best that I can. It is hard to say I will eliminate processed foods and high carb foods but I will commit to thinking my meals through and doing the best I can do with what I have.
I will begin this change in my life habits on the first day of my 40th year (so that means on Thursday). I feel this is the best way to begin. I don't want to be "bathing suit ready by summer"; I could give a shit about that. I want to be the ball of awesomeness, at my core, and ring 40 in with a lot of high fives. I am ready.
When I began my 30th year of life, I was not in the best of places. I had increasing anxiety and a fear of being around people. I would fall asleep when I was out with friends. I had very poor self-esteem and my health (apparently) was not in the best of places. About mid-way through that year of life, my body told me to slow down. I had my only seizure thus far which made me go to the hospital for testing. I was not healthy. I needed to change my life or I might not see 40 without some really insane health issues. I changed my life: began working out 5 days a week, eating lower carbs and meditating and doing yoga to calm my mind and find my center. On my 30th birthday, I was full of energy and had a vigor for life. Of course, a few years following this is when the real self-analysis happened and I started to be honest about who I was and how I wanted to live, as fearful as it was at the time. My life changed and it was so much better in so many ways.
Somehow, I felt that I could never slip back into unhealthiness again. I have absolutely maintained my sanity: my life is the best it has ever been. I truly mean that when I say it. I cry sometimes, just to myself, because I honestly never thought my life could be this full with my little family. I honestly see my future, with my wife and girls, and it is clear and beautiful and bright. My only concern is my health.
As this 40th year begins, I find myself sleepy (A LOT), cranky, and overweight. I use to blame it on my boobs, saying that they were choking me when I lay down. But honestly, it's my tummy. Now, in case you are not aware, I like to eat. I like curves and I am not all about the skinny figure. My concern is that my body is not responding the way it should be. My knees feel arthritic and no longer have the energy that I had just 10 years ago. I have tried to start doing things but I lack commitment and always have an excuse. But now, it is time. And I am making my commitment here.
I have no goal weight. But I do have an exercise goal. I am committing, to myself, my family and to anyone who reads this, to exercise 4 days of the week. I also am committing to meditate regularly. I cannot state a numeric goal, however, I would like to meditate when I need to. I think it will help me stay focused. I am also committing to eating healthier. I need to keep portion control at the top of my list. I am going to refrain from sugar and eat smaller portions. I am going to do the best that I can. It is hard to say I will eliminate processed foods and high carb foods but I will commit to thinking my meals through and doing the best I can do with what I have.
I will begin this change in my life habits on the first day of my 40th year (so that means on Thursday). I feel this is the best way to begin. I don't want to be "bathing suit ready by summer"; I could give a shit about that. I want to be the ball of awesomeness, at my core, and ring 40 in with a lot of high fives. I am ready.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)